Hotel Peeves

December 30, 2009 11:13 – 11:13
  1. The bathtub floor should be at the same level as the bathroom floor. Few humans are built like giraffes.
  2. Walls and ceilings should be thick enough that guests don’t need to travel with white noise generators. Yes, I would still have mine with me. But, it shouldn’t be necessary.
  3. Bathrooms need vent fans. If you don’t understand why, then you are very fortunate. In addition to the obvious, they help in clearing steam out after showers, too.
  4. If the room has a loud fan-based climate control unit, then the fan should stay on all the time while the heat or a/c cycles on/off as needed. Hint: when the system cycles on or off, it should not wake the guest up.
  5. If rooms have adjoining doors, smoking and non-smoking rooms should never be connected. We non-smokers don’t want our clean air to offend those who prefer smoke.
  6. If hotels have smoking rooms, they should be in a different hotel. See #4. Guests should not have to walk through clouds of smoke on the way to their rooms (this includes on the way into the hotel—so employees who smoke should have designated areas that the public doesn’t have to encounter).
  7. Bars of soap should be big enough so that they don’t break when you try to use them.
  8. In-room coffeemakers are fine. Hot water kettles would be better. Few tea drinkers like coffee-flavored tea, and coffeemakers don’t get the water hot enough anyway. Teabags are needed, too—and more than just one. If the room accommodates two people, why should they have to flip a coin to see which one has to have the decaf?
  9. Guests need supporting surfaces or luggage stands for at least two standard pieces of luggage.
  10. If you’re going to have a table in a room for two people, then the room should have at least two chairs. Plus, the table should not be chin-high when you’re seated. The furniture should be functional—not merely decorative.

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